strict behaviour modification for sissies . . . . l i k e   y o u.
.

ready for your transformation?In my previous article, I mentioned cleansing the liver on a regular basis. This is crucial for everyone, not just those of you participating in hormone therapies. Your liver is one of the most vital organs you possess. If it is damaged, your body cannot function properly. Without it, you cannot survive. An unhealthy liver is the root of many physical problems, and can complicate others.

When you undergo any kind of chemical treatment, the liver is affected. This holds true whether you are taking prescription antibiotics, or herbal or synthetic hormone treatments, or any treatment for any ailment. Everything that you ingest passes through the liver in some form, via the blood stream. Many of these substances end up stored in the liver, as the body does not know how to rid itself of many of the unnatural toxins we ingest daily, from chemicals to preservatives to additives. When the liver becomes overloaded, it develops problems that can lead from mild to dangerous to fatal. Even a mildly sluggish liver can seriously affect our energy levels, and our libidos! Always remember that the liver is responsible for the hormone levels in our bodies. If the liver is impaired in any way, your hormone levels are affected, as is the liver’s ability to process incoming hormones from feminizing therapies.

This in turn affects the kidneys, gall bladder, spleen, heart, brain – every system of the body. Once the liver is full, other organs try to help with the storage/elimination problem, overworking and damaging them as well. Taking care of the liver means taking care of all of the body’s systems as well.

Synthetic hormone residues end up stored in the liver. Once the buildup becomes too much, the liver begins to have trouble eliminating wastes from the body, as well as trouble digesting our food. This then leads to a buildup of toxins in other organs, and in all the tissues of the body, including the brain. A buildup of this nature can be fatal, if the liver doesn’t first cease to function altogether. So it is our job to eliminate these toxins from the body on a regular basis. It is also our job to feed the liver the nutrients it needs to support its important functions and aid it in regeneration, as well as to occasionally give it a complete break from all we put it through in a day.

Hormone therapy especially calls for a need to monitor the liver carefully. When hormones, synthetic or herbal, reach a saturation point in the liver, you will then experience an overload of that substance in the body. You continue to take your estrogen (or any other substance, such as antibiotics), the liver is already full and cannot remove more from the blood or process what is at hand, and you suddenly are full of many times the amount of estrogen your body needs. The result of this can be as simple as chronic depression or wild mood swings, or can then manifest into many other serious and potentially fatal problems, not the least of which is cirrhosis.

This includes such substances as alcohol and recreational drugs. If you are undergoing hormone therapy, these are two things that you should be staying far away from. You are already taxing your liver’s abilities with the hormone therapy. Add in the damage that has been proven to be caused by these substances, and you are a walking train wreck waiting to happen. Binge drinking is very dangerous when on hormones of any kind. If you have ever watched someone die of liver failure, then you know what I mean by that. If not, spare yourself and your loved ones of the hideous lengthy scene and intense pain it creates. Organ donors are in very short supply, and transgenders are not at the top of the list as a recipient.

Many of you are unaware of all the work the liver has to do. Here’s a bit of information: It cleanses toxins from the body (and if it cannot eliminate properly due to impairment or illness, it stores these toxins either in the liver or directs it to other places in the body), it is a very vital part of the digestive process, it processes hormones, it regulates blood sugar levels, it controls cholesterol levels, it processes nutrients from our food for the body to utilize properly, it controls metabolism, it forms bile for the digestive process, the bulk of plasma proteins is manufactured by the liver, it stores and produces glucose in conjunction with the pancreas and as such is the target for almost all of the hormones involved in blood sugar regulation and carbohydrate metabolism, it regulates the plasma cholesterol level, and I could go on and on as it is a very complex organ that we just cannot do without for any length of time. So you can see from this brief list what would be affected if the liver were impaired; and clearly, alcohol impairs the liver as has been shown in study after study for many years, as does many other substances, including our food additives.

If you are a drinker, a recreational drug user, a long-time prescription drug user, or suffer from chronic illness, I would highly suggest undergoing a full liver cleanse cycle prior to beginning any hormone therapy, herbal or synthetic. Your liver needs to be nourished and ready to tackle the job you have for it to perform. This cleanse also cleans out other vital organs, your blood, your intestines, so it is a vital cleanse for your overall health.

Overall, a regular liver cleanse is important to your entire family as well. Remember those days when grandma or great-grandma gave you her special spring tonic? It tasted awful, but you sure felt good afterwards. This was a typical way folks took care of themselves, making cleaning out the body a normal task of every spring cleaning session. Somewhere along the line, we lost this knowledge, or discarded it, thinking that in today’s modern world that it just wasn’t necessary any more. How wrong we all were! It is more important now than it ever was 20 or 30 years ago. Our foods are highly processed, full of additives, our lives are full of stress and caffeine and sugar and frustration and our bodies really need a regular break from all of these stimulants. Our organs need all the support we can give them to continue functioning well right into our golden years.

The first step to a healthy liver (and body!) is diet, which is discussed more in depth in another article. There is no substitute for eating properly and obtaining as much of your daily nutritional needs from whole foods, rather than from synthetic vitamins. You should be eating a diet high in fiber, low in saturated fat, and low/absent in refined sugars. Eat foods every day that are high in vitamin C, vitamin E, zinc, and selenium. These nutrients protect the liver and other organs from free radical damage. You should avoid processed foods (such as lunchmeats, junk foods, etc.), soft drinks, fried foods, salty foods, and white sugar (and especially sugar substitutes!). Try using honey as a nutritious replacement to sugars. Limit your caffeine intake, or stop using it altogether (caffeine can cause breast tenderness and pain amongst other things). Limit red meats, and add fish to your diet at least once per week. Eat plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables, particularly dark leafy greens, whole grains, and legumes.

The first couple of days of your cleansing regimen you should fast lightly. Drink plenty of fresh water, fresh fruit and vegetable juices, and eat very lightly, such as simple broths or cooked vegetable soups, if at all. It is preferable to avoid eating solid foods for the first two to three days, as this gives the liver a rest from the rigors of digestion, and gives the body a better chance to clear out toxins. If you cannot do without foods, keep it as light as possible. Plenty of fresh water every day is very necessary to help flush the toxins from your system. If you live in an area where your tap water is questionable, use bottled water.

After the first couple of days, you can slowly increase your diet by adding foods, starting lightly, and avoiding red meats, all processed foods and sugars, and all foods that contain any sort of chemical additive (colorings, preservatives, flavor enhancers, etc.). Concentrate on totally healthy foods during the liver cleanse. If you are taking a synthetic hormone therapy, discontinue your hormones for a minimum of four days, or as advised by your physician. If you are on herbal therapy, you should discontinue your herbal feminizing regimen for a minimum of four days, although I generally recommend doing without them for the entire first week. You won’t arrest your development, and you won’t suddenly lose all of the feminine characteristics you possess at this point. You will be doing your body a huge favor by staying off of them for this period of time.

Here I will pass along the most effective GENERAL cleansing therapy I have devised, as it is used for treating hepatitis and other liver ailments, as well as for cleansing and supporting the liver. It also includes items that cleanse and nourish other vital systems of the body. I have discovered it to be most effective for keeping you healthy during and after feminization, and have utilized this particular cleanse with a great many illnesses with excellent results.

I then suggest the following combination:

4 capsules Milk Thistle
3 capsules Dandelion Root
2 capsules Ginger Root
2 capsules Sarsaparilla
2 capsules Yellow Dock
2 capsules Burdock
2 capsules Nettle
1 capsule Parsley
2 capsules Kelp

 

Use this entire combination twice per day, morning and evening. Capsule size is not real important here, although you should utilize individual capsule milligram sizes below 1000 mg when possible. It is important, however, to avoid standardized or extracted versions of these herbs, which are not nearly as effective as the whole herb, especially for a cleanse.

In the middle of the day, drink a liver support tea, such as this combination:

cup dried Alfalfa leaf
cup dried Red Clover blossoms
cup dried Peppermint leaves
cup dried Sage leaf
1/4 cup dried Nettle leaf
cup dried crushed Rose hips

Mix together these dry herbs, and store in a dark glass container away from heat and light. Make the tea by using one to two teaspoons of the dry herb, steeped for 10 minutes in very hot, not boiling, water. Strain, sweeten with honey to taste (not sugar!).

 

An alternative tea recipe that does the same job but has a different taste:

cup dried Alfalfa leaf
cup Ginger Root
cup dried Peppermint leaves
cup dried Rosemary leaf
cup dried crushed Rose hips

Prepare as above.

 

Continue this regimen for one week. For the second week of the cleanse, continue to drink the tea in the middle of the day. Change the encapsulated herbs to the following:

3 capsules Dandelion Root
3 capsules Milk Thistle
1 capsules Ginger
2 capsules Nettle
2 capsules Kelp

 

Take this exact combination twice per day. At the end of the two week cleanse cycle, return to your regular feminization program. This is the perfect time to make necessary adjustments to your feminizing regimens as needed. You can continue to drink the liver tonic tea two or three times per week, if you so desire. Remain on a healthy daily diet, and you should enjoy better health, and in most cases improved feminizing results. You will need to undergo this cleanse at least once per year, although some medical conditions and concerns may require that you do this more often. Your health care professional can help you determine your specific needs.

I do not recommend taking daily liver tonic herbs during the first three months of beginning hormone therapy. This cleanses the liver out too thoroughly at the beginning, and does not give the body time to understand and adjust to what it needs to be doing to process the incoming hormones.

For maintenance of the liver during the rest of the year, various versions of the above may be used, or you may need something different altogether. It is best to check with a trained professional who can devise the best program for your personal needs and medical history. Certain medical conditions or concerns may require that this be done more often, that you utilize different combinations of cleansing herbs, or that the extended cleanse be utilized more often – please contact me or your certified health professional for more information if you need it. THIS IS GENERAL INFORMATION ONLY and not intended to be the perfect cleanse protocol for everyone!

I recommend  following a regular cleansing regimen such as this one for all hormonal therapies, both synthetic and herbal, for anyone with a chronic illness or disease, for anyone under a lot of stress, for anyone who doesn’t eat as well as they should, and as a regular body maintenance program. Committing to following this regimen on a regular basis, coupled with a healthy diet and regular productive exercise, will prolong your life and overall organ health, as well as ensure continued good general health.

 

Rev. Dr. EarthAngel
The Herbal Encyclopedia
Benevolent Member of The Sissify Staff

Copyright 1998-2013 by Rev. Dr. EarthAngel, ND, DD · All rights reserved


Time for your shot?So you’ve been surfing the net and haunting the library and hanging out in book stores looking for every tidbit of information you can find on feminization. You think you know enough to make an informed decision. But do you really?

I’ve been in the Internet chat rooms, I’ve sat in offices with patients, I’ve listened to people on the phone and in person. I know how much misinformation there is out there, and how many of you take that as Gospel. I’m here to tell you, if you believe all of it, you are doing yourself a grave injustice.

I spend half my days correcting false information, so I know there is a lot of it out there. There are even those who like to take my own words and twist them around to suit their personal needs when chatting with others (I know who you are!). I see so much nonsense that my own mind gets boggled and confused, and I’m supposed to be the professional! No wonder so many of you are so very rattled and shaken. So let’s correct a few major falsehoods right here.

The first one I want to address is the statement “you aren’t a real transgender unless you go all the way”. Such prejudicial bias in that sentence, isn’t there?! Basically, you are who you are. No one particular action, decision, or comment is going to change that. Transgenders come in as many forms and styles as there are people wearing the label. It is not appropriate for every person to undergo SRS. It is not appropriate for every TG to be taking hormones. It is not appropriate for every TG to be taking the same hormones in the same dosages. It is not appropriate for every TG to live life the same way as the next. What is appropriate is what works for YOU and your life. You are a real transgender, regardless of whether or not you take hormones, regardless of whether or not you opt for surgery. Never forget that. You ARE real!

The second one is “if you are really serious you would take prescription drugs, herbs don’t work”. More prejudicial bias at work here. If you are serious, then you should be addressing your personal needs, your personal health, your personal goals. You are serious when you embark on a path and stick with it to its logical conclusion. You are serious when you ingest anything that is designed to alter your current body chemistry. Period. Where do you naysayers think drugs come from? They come directly from herbs originally, but because the big companies can’t patent a plant, they work to make a chemical copy of what they think a plant has in it that makes it work the way it does. Sometimes they come close, sometimes they are very far off. That doesn’t matter to them, what matters is that they have a patented product to sell and make more money off of. Nobody gets rich growing, harvesting, and marketing herbs. Comfortable, sometimes maybe; rich, no way. And if herbs didn’t work in some degree, then why and how did the idea come about in the first place? Of course, there can be some truth to that original statement – herbs don’t work, if you are looking for the same speed, the same effects, the same negatives, the same positives. We can’t compare apples and oranges and come out with papayas. That aside, if you take the correct herbs matched to your body and your medical history, then you are just as serious as the self-prescribing tranny next door or in that favorite chat room.

Since I am now accepted and qualified as both counselor and primary doctor for SRS patients heading to Thailand, as well as natural SRS patients I have in other countries, I think I would be the first to know if a natural regimen wasn’t “appropriate”. Thanks to open minds that exist, it is not only appropriate, it’s happening. Natural is not inferior. Synthetics are not superior. It’s a personal choice based on your personal needs.

You are not incorrect if you choose one way over another. You are only incorrect if you throw away your health pursuing nonsense or listening to nonsense or BELIEVING nonsense. You should be committed to the process, you should be committed to protecting your long-term health, and you should be committed to being yourself. That’s all the pre-requisites there should be on any path. The rest is up to you. You are an individual, what you do needs to be right for you, not decided by people who have never met you and could never know how your health and safety could be compromised by your following their “expert advice”. Being transgendered does not make one an instant expert on the subject, it only makes one an expert on their own personal situation and transition. Bear that in mind, and keep plugging forward on your chosen personal path. Listen to advice, check out resources, consult with REAL certified professionals, but ultimately, all the decisions about your body should be yours and yours alone.

Rev. Dr. EarthAngel
The Herbal Encyclopedia 
Benevolent Member of The Sissify Staff
earthangel@sissify.com

Copyright 1998-2006 by Rev. Dr. EarthAngel, ND, DD · All rights reserved

 


After a while, not quite as shaken as when I first sat up, I looked across the room. There on a chair within easy reach was a luminous blue satin dressing gown, a brighter shade than Kate usually wore, and a large, heavy-duty bra. Then as if to make up for the utilitarian massiveness of the bra, a teeny pair of delicate rose lace hi-leg panties. And a note.

I sat back on the bed and opened the note. Kate was going all out — the paper was perfumed, that floral scent I remembered from before she went to work at the clinic, that she still wore when we went out somewhere fancy. I breathed it in and opened the note, and read:

* * *

“My Darling Annie, or if it’s Andy reading this, my poor bewildered Andy. First, I want to remind you, whichever you are, that you are *mine*, not your own person. You pledged yourself to me knowing

that I intended to do things you might not like, however deeply a desire for some them might be implanted in your psyche. I think you know now what I intend. I intend to make a woman of you. A real one, not a simpering transvestite concoction of one, which is probably all you’d have managed to make of yourself without me, and not a Drag Queen either. But also, not the kind of woman you’d be if you’d been born a girl and raised in the same circumstances you’ve enjoyed as a boy, not a restrained, educated professional woman. Not even a woman like me, more venturesome than you are, more of a take-charge kind of person. No, someone different.

“Brace yourself, darling. I want you to become my kind of woman, the kind I’d love to spend time with, and go out with, and make love with. And date men with. The kind I find exciting, as you’ve never been as a man. Impulsive. Playful, even silly at times. Instinctive and generous, warm hearted. Physical in many ways, most of them feminine — tender and demonstrative when you feel affectionate, which will be often, and sexy when you feel a yearning for that kind of pleasure, also often. Not too inhibited. In fact, a little smutty in pursuit of your pleasures. The kind of girl men are happy to find they’ve been fixed up with on a blind date, because attractive at first glance. The kind men remember the next day with smiles on their faces. And don’t be shocked dear. The kind of girl women can remember the next day with smiles. The kind I’ve always wanted to remember with smiles.

“If that isn’t you now, and I know it isn’t, that’s what will be you. You are mine. I’ve always wanted that kind of girlfriend, so that’s the kind of girl you will become. You’ll try with all your heart, soul, and might to become that girl. I know you will. You have no other future.

“When you’ve succeeded, when you like being that kind of girl, then you can be my friend as well as my servant, and we can enjoy that relationship too. You are already married to me, as you know. I may then be willing to marry you. But only then. We’ll see.

“Love,

Ms. Katherine

P.S. You see in front of you the first intimate wear of the kind you will wear for the rest of your life, your first bra and panties. Congratulations, sweetheart. Also a rather lively gown, the kind Annie will soon love to wear as the truest expression of her own lively nature. I’m sorry the bra looks something like a washer woman’s, but your breasts, your pledge of servitude to me, need that kind of support right now. I’ve tried to make up for it by giving you panties a whore might blush to wear. Put them all on, and splash some of my cologne on too, and some matching scuffs from my closet. While you wait for me to return I want you to begin browsing through some of the women’s magazines I’ve accumulated downstairs, ads and all. They’re your kind of magazines now. They’re the sole occupation of your mind from now on.”

* * *

With my nightie off I saw Kate was true to her word, the only fringe of hair anywhere on my body was neatly trimmed around my pubes — the rest was smooth. I dressed as Ms. Katherine ordered. The bra felt heavy on my shoulders until I realized the weight was in my hanging tits, eased when I remembered to stand up very straight. But then they protruded out, way too far forward. I doubted even a loose sports jackets would cover them, much less a tailored suit jacket. How would I go to work? With a weight on my shoulders, or else with a lot of explaining. The panties were indeed teeny, designed to curve below the curve of my belly and across the curves of my buns. I didn’t have a woman’s sexily rounded buns yet, but I knew I’d get them, if not by hormones then by more implants. Kate would see to it.

I inspected myself in the mirror, and I saw a man with straight long hair — that’s how I liked it — wearing a large bra and skimpy scanties. Boobs nicely proportioned for his shoulders, which were a little large. The breasts would swell up even more when the hormones got hold of them, I realized, no doubt as part of Kate’s plan for me to look like a sex pot at anyone’s first glance. Waist a bit thick — I should diet. Then I realized that was a girl’s thought, Kate’s scheme was getting to me. Hips narrow, but that’s true of some women, I knew. Big bulge in my panties so far, thank God! Could I become the kind of girl Kate wanted? Possibly, with diet and the right makeup and gear. And the right temperament. It could be fun. My face was small-featured, and I had an unassertive chin I’d always regretted. Now I could see it was a dainty chin. Or might become one. Did I want to become Kate’s kind of girl? Did I have a choice?

I wriggled my hips at the apparition in the mirror, and immediately felt silly, even indecent. So I took a full-figured blouse and a wide skirt out of Kate’s closet almost without looking at them, and I put them on. The bottom of the skirt brushed my calves delicately. The blouse was short sleeved and nylon or something, so when I put the satin dressing gown on over it I felt incredibly slippy all over, like wearing liquid. With another glance in the mirror I saw that its bright iridescent blue seemed to light up the room. That’s me, life of the party, I thought ruefully, and went down to the living room.

There I picked up a copy of “Cosmopolitan.” I noticed immediately that my breasts were already larger than on most of the women photographed in that magazine, even the “Cosmo” girl. I started reading an article on how to keep *him* interested in asking you out again. Some of the advice was excellent — ask him to tell you about himself, and admire anything you can that he’s accomplished — I wished girls would do that for me. I wished girls had done that for me. I realized that I was expected to do that, now. But a pang of panic struck my midriff! With guys? No, I wouldn’t! I was Kate’s!

Some of the advice was practical — “If he seems excited to be with you, help him sustain that level of excitement by caressing him in sensitive areas. You can find out quickly enough if he’s sized to your needs. And being kissed by a smooth, wet, deep mouth is sure to please him!”

Now I shuddered. To kiss a man? Did Kate mean that? Before this was over did she want me satisfying men with hand jobs? Worse, with blow jobs? Real ones on real men, not idle fantasies? Swallowing real cum? “Smutty” was what my Mistress wanted, and she’d see to it that’s what she made me! Even more, would I as a woman need to let men — I tried to imagine it and couldn’t, and felt a little queasy — enter me?

And pump me? And cum in me? Deep inside me? Oh my God!

That was as much as I could take. There had to be a way out of this! This was only a game, a scene we were playing, and I was taking it too seriously! Then I realized I had no safe word. Kate had started me off with the injected hormones and breast implants so the road back would be harder than the path of least resistance, so I’d go with whatever she wanted, like it or not, and learn to like it. I was already part way where she wanted me. Dressed like a courtesan and reading up on how to get laid.

I decided to read the ads instead of all the distressing no-brainers on “How to Get Real Hunky Men to Fuck You Senseless” There were hundreds of ads for make-up! Eye liner and shadow and pencil and mascara in varying shades were individually mysterious, and as I realized when I studied page after page of superbly blended eyes on gorgeous models, how those powders and brushes and pencils could create the mysterious seductiveness of those eyes was beyond any male comprehension. I’d never learn how to use them!

Still, I had to please Kate until I could persuade her somehow to give up her plan for me but marry me anyhow — my only apparent way out. Applied Lipstick looked like a course I could teach myself. I read an article on the new shades, and figured out the uses of lip liners and upper-lip shaping, went back to our bedroom, and applied a dark maroon to my mouth. That would show Kate that I was trying.

Now a glance into the mirror revealed a man in a bright blue satin gown wearing lipstick. Neatly, though. I went down again and read on, wondering why I wasn’t getting increasingly resentful. Was I really a wimp? Look what she had done to me! Did I really want it? I suspected there were more tranquilizers in me than I knew.

A few hours later Kate returned. I was back at the computer when she arrived, originally to get some more advice from Sissify.Com about make-up and how to cope with my new situation, but now looking at different e-mailed reactions to the report I’d turned in. I saw I had to go into the office to talk to some associates.

“Looking for some new games to play, Annie?” she said when she saw me staring at the screen. “Remember you’re my plaything now, and I make up all our games. Any time you forget that, just fold your arms across your chest to remind yourself.”

“No, this is business,” I said a little morosely. “I have to talk to some people downtown. Tomorrow.” I turned around and stared at her. I was now in no mood to play, but realized that for a servant I had spoken out of line. “Ms. Katherine, Ma’am?” There was a faint edge of sarcasm in my voice. “Do I have to kowtow to you all the time from now on? Can’t we just talk?”

She didn’t seem to mind my asking. “Any time there are other people present, certainly we can just talk, Andy honey. Then we’ll talk the way we’ve always talked. Of course you’ll always agree with everything I say, and I look forward to hearing the reasons you’ll give for agreeing with some of my the things I’ll say.

I’ll say some outrageous things sometimes, just to keep you in line. At first you’ll agree with me any way you can, but when you’ve become the woman I want, I’m sure you’ll agree with me sincerely.”

“When nobody’s around it’ll always be different. I’ll expect you to remember your place and my place, and to address me appropriately. This is a process, a journey, and we’re only just beginning. When you finally arrive where I mean to take you, when you’re the kind of girl I want you to be, then maybe we’ll talk as

equals sometimes. I expect that by then you’ll be so pleased with yourself you’ll want to thank me. Are you resenting me a little right now?”

I hesitated. “Yes, Ms. Katherine” was all I said.

She stared at me a moment. “I appreciate your honesty. And also your effort to please me by wearing lipstick. You did a good job there for your first time. The shade’s a bit too maroon for the color of your robe, but you’ll learn about things like that.” She smiled. “That’s the favorite shade of a girl I went with my last year in college. I loved seeing her lips that color while they tugged on my nipples and nibbled on my clit. I’ll love seeing yours there too. If you really like it, we’ll build your outfits around it, honey. It’s still fashionable.”

Kate a Lesbian when she was in college? No, probably experimental, bisexual. And now me too?

Then Kate commented further. “That’s a pretty blouse you picked out, even though I didn’t ask you to. I’m glad you like it. It’s yours now, and I think that’s what you’ll wear when you go to your office tomorrow for your meetings. Just a touch of lace on the collar ends, and it billows beautifully, so no one has to know about your new breasts. They’re a ‘C’ cup now, incidentally. Your hormones will soon make you at least one size large still, really a knockout, though of course we don’t want to overdo anything.”

She waited. “Yes, Ms. Katherine,” I replied. What else was there to say? The humiliations were beginning? She was punishing me for my lack of enthusiasm earlier that I was being turned into her slut girlfriend? What else she was planning to do to me?

“When you go in for your conference, select a nice gold chain for a necklace and wear that too, tucked under that collar, so no one can miss seeing the lace. I don’t care how you explain the blouse and chain if anyone asks, but I think afterward you’ll feel a little more grateful to me for what I’m doing. Remember, you agreed to all of this, wholeheartedly and repeatedly. And I saw when we were prepping you for your breast implants that you had sealed your agreement with an orgasm all on your own!”

I swallowed hard. “Yes, Ms. Katherine,” I said a lot more sincerely.

She waved her hand to say that gratitude was unnecessary. “Don’t worry about what people think. If you feel like it, flash your tits at anyone who mocks you. They’re real conversation-stoppers already, those breasts, believe me. Some women would kill for a figure like the one you’re going to have. Finish up the project you’re on, and then turn in your two-weeks notice, and tell them you’re taking off those two weeks as accrued sick leave. I need to change you utterly, Annie, and I can’t do that if you’re spending all your days in some cubicle worrying about people who have nothing better to do than insult you for obeying me.”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“That’s better. You should know that one more insolent innuendo in your responses would have sent you to work tomorrow in a skirt too. Any questions?”

“Yes, Ma’am. How will we get by without my salary?”

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about that, Andy honey,” she said. “Maybe you’ll work for me in the Clinic. We need to make our records more accessible. You can do that for us. Maybe later on I’ll get you to turn tricks — it would help you develop the right kind of sluttish personality. Which reminds me, we need to make your pretty little head pretty as soon as possible, so you can begin being a girl in public right away without disgracing either of us. Learn by doing! So day after tomorrow we get you a new hair style and makeover.”

The next day’s meetings were arduous, but we got all the understandings ironed out and concluded that I could fine-tune the project completely from home in no time. I thought at first everyone was pointing fingers at my blouse, but I suspect most never even noticed. I suppose they thought I was affecting some

mod style, or a pirate or an 18th century grandee.

Only Becky Davis, our whiz kid from Sales, commented on it. “Very pretty blouse, Andy,” she said. “Looks just like one I once had. I didn’t know you leaned toward my taste in clothes.”

I didn’t know if that was a compliment or not. Becky was thin as a plank and as starved as a model, but she wore her clothes with great style and panache. So I looked pleasant and said nothing.

“It’s so full in front you could grow tits in them and no one would ever know,” she added. “Have you thought of doing that? Have you found yourself a boyfriend who likes big tits on guys?” So her remark *was* intended to be an insult.

I straightened my shoulders and thrust my chest way forward, and my bra poked unmistakable mounds into the front of the blouse. Becky stared! “I already have grown them,” I said. “You should try it some time yourself, and get some guy interested in you for once. Or some girl!”

It was her turn to say nothing.

When I got home Kate was stretched out on the couch in a robe, obviously through with her own work for the day. I changed into the skirt and medium heels she’d laid out for me, and then told her about my interchange with Becky. She was both pleased and amused.

“See, I told you,” she said. “Accept yourself for what you are, right now a man with big boobies, and later a woman with generous boobies, and no one can reach you. So what are you?”

“Right now I’m a man with big boobies, Ma’am, and your property.”

“That’s right. My sissy girl property. I’m very pleased that you’re through working downtown. Those breasts aren’t a mere whim, they’re very important, they’re your passage into a new life. I mean for you to become a passable woman. It will take time and effort, on your part especially. But there will come a moment, you’ll see, when the sissy man disappears in your own mind and the girl of my dreams replaces him. That’s where I want us to end up. When I saw you playing girlie-girlie fantasies at that computer,

lots of things fell into place for me. You’re going to become a girl very soon. Now listen closely, Annie. Do you want to become a girl as soon as possible?”

“Yes, Ms. Katherine,” I said. I realized that wasn’t enough of a response. But I wasn’t really persuaded. And I had one serious reservation. “Ms. Katherine, may I ask you a question?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Ms. Katherine, when I’m a girl, will I still have my…my…male parts?” I was afraid to name them, for fear she’d suddenly be reminded I wasn’t already gelded, pick up the phone, and order up a castration and penectomy to go.

She just smiled. “You poor dear. That’s the last vestige of masculinity a man reaches for, isn’t it. Well, your female hormones will soon render them useless, but you can keep them as long as you want them. I suspect there will come a time when you’ll prefer a cunt, if only because by then you’ll like being attractive to men, and men adore cunts. When that happens we’ll have your “male parts” as you call them turned inside out into a cunt. It’s done all the time these days. Does that ease your mind?”

“Yes, Ms. Katherine.”

“Learn your girlhood lessons well, and I’ll let you masturbate a little, while that thing still provides you pleasure. On rare occasions, when you accomplish something I find impressive, I may even allow you to masturbate until you cum. But your main sexual pleasure from now for a while to come will be from your new nipples– caress them all you want, whenever you wish. It’ll help you appreciate them. Enjoy your femininity! And right now, Annie, it’s time for you to enjoy mine. Here!”

She pulled back her robe, and I saw that she was wearing nothing underneath. I saw the furry triangle of her crotch, and her slit. and her creamy white thighs.

“I promised you could kiss my naked pussy. Now you shall. It’s exactly the same way it was when I brought it home from work a few days ago, a little sweaty, a little pissy, maybe even a little lubricated too, because feminizing you excites me. Is some man’s cum in there too? You don’t know, do you? Well, you’ll just have to work it out on your own.” She smiled to herself and went on, “With your tongue. Come here and lick me now, Annie. This will be a regular reward for you whenever I come home, as long as you do your other work well.”

She shifted her hips slightly and dropped one leg to the floor, then raised the other high onto the back of the couch. There it was! Her pink slit was now perched on the edge of the couch, wide open. I fell to my knees and again buried my face in her crotch, this time slathering my nose into its musky, fermy, sour center, and I began to lick her. She tasted slightly acrid, but sweet, and salty, and fishy, and creamy, and — she was the woman I had sworn to serve with all of the manhood in me, and now all of the femininity too,

and I began to lick and suck and tongue and kiss her more passionately! Was there a love potion in that twat? Really some man’s cum? I didn’t know! It was divine! I loved her! My tongue probed way down and became a prehensile snake. I buried it in her and started to tongue-fuck her.

Almost immediately she started to moan. I ran the tip of my tongue up one edge of her slot and down the other, then up onto her clit, and again into the center line where there lurked, I knew, a deep and mysterious hole fit to entertain a small man’s five inch prick or a large man’s fist and wrist. Then I moved back to her lit again, where I loitered and licked and loitered and labored. She moaned louder, and shook, and screamed, then began to make strange animal sounding growls, and then screamed again. No woman’s cunny was ever cleaned more thoroughly or enjoyably.

When I lifted my soaked face I felt proud. “Very good, Annie honey,” she said, still breathing hard. “I knew it! You will make the sweetest girl anyone can imagine. Next time would you wear that dark lipstick for me? Now fix me dinner.”

I did that too. It was easy. I was in love again. Before I sat down to eat with her, I tried to make my whole face up like a woman’s, as a gift to my precious, my darling Ms. Katherine. I failed, but she looked at it and smiled, and said nothing. That night we slept in the same bed, and in the early morning when she was returning from a visit to the john and the moisture of her piss was on her like rank dew, I kissed and licked her crotch to yet another orgasmic spasm. My own prick was pulsing fit to explode the whole time, but she wanted me to hold back, she said, so she could redirect my sexual energy. Toward who? Toward what? I maintained iron control, and nothing came of it.

continued in Chapter 3


(as dictated to Vickie Tern)

Dear Sissify Staff:

I think you should know how my signing on with you has changed my life. I know I’m happier now by far, but that isn’t up to me any more. My girlfriend now owns me and she’s so satisfied with me that finally she has decided to marry me. But ours hasn’t exactly been a typical romance. I’d better tell you about it.

I’ve always enjoyed imagining what it would be like to be a girl, to look as pretty and dress the way girls do. I’ve downloaded lots of stories about it from the Net. But I’ve never had the courage to try it myself, not even to try on a pair of panties. The thought always got me trembling. My urges got so powerful they frightened me — I couldn’t tell where they’d lead. That’s why I joined up immediately when I saw your web site instructing me how to become a virtual girl. It was fun obeying your orders, and pretending I was doing all those feminine things, and then reading your encouraging messages.

Well, it happens that a couple of months ago I was reading where you explain to sissies how to please their men by sucking their cocks, when suddenly I heard my girlfriend’s voice just behind me.

“Oh, my!” she said. “How fascinating! But you read so slowly, Andy! Scroll down so I can see which they advise you to do first, lick the pre-cum off the tip of the man’s cock or just take the whole head into your mouth! Which do you do?”

I was shocked! Never so embarrassed in my life! There behind me was my girlfriend Kate calmly reading the screen over my shoulder! How long had she been there?! What must she think of me!? That would never have happened last year when she was still doing office work, and wore perfume and clicked around all day on heels. I always knew when she was home, from her scent and her sound. But then she finished her nursing degree and took that job in that downtown clinic, and now between her rubber-soled shoes and her silent ways she could be anywhere! Like, just behind me!

“Is this what you dream about when you’re not working?” she asked. “Becoming a girl? Tell me, sweetie, right now is that what you are in your own mind? If that what you want to be? Do you want to wear pretty clothes, and look cute, so boys will like you? I mean even when you aren’t giving them head?”

“I e-mailed a long report in this afternoon,” was all I could think to say. “My boss says he’s happy with it. I thought I’d just look around a little,” I finished vaguely. My face was flushed deep red because now the screen was illustrating the best ways to slide your bright red lips up and down a cock so a man will cum in your mouth.

“Let’s see what this place is, what the web site is where you like to just look around a little.”

Before I could reach for an off-switch she leaned over and took the mouse and began clicking her way back and forth through the whole Sissify web site. I just sat there, humiliated. There was no escaping even the name, “Sissify.” That is what it was for. For feminizing men. She glanced at medical papers on hormones and stories about wives and girlfriends converting men into their sisters or whores and different domineering women demanding that their sissies wear panties and brassieres all the time and pictures of men fully dressed as women with real breasts and real cocks too, and many appreciative letters to the staff thanking them for their help. Now and then she glanced at me, a slight smile curling her mouth. In no time she’d seen it all.

“Well,” she said. “Very interesting. I see you didn’t just stumble into this garden of delights. You had to join up, didn’t you, uh, ‘Annie.’ That’s your screen name, isn’t it, sweetheart? That’s so sweet! You even had to fill out an elaborate questionnaire, didn’t you? You really want this, don’t you?”

She remembered something. “Did you remember to tell them how once you volunteered to rinse out my soiled undies, and I let you? I thought it was an odd offer at the time, and I wondered about you. Did you sniff them? Did you try on some of my prettier panties afterward?”

“No, I didn’t dare.” I had nothing else to say. I sat there clutching my hands in my lap. Nowhere to hide! I felt devastated!

“You didn’t dare follow out your little urges? You wanted me to tell you to wear my panties?” Her voice was no longer mocking, but it had taken on an odd lilt.

I said nothing. That was what I wanted, yes.

“You know, Andy dear,” she went on. “I’ve been thinking about your proposal to me, your wanting to marry me? I mean, we do live together and all, but I’d had no idea you felt that way toward me, that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me and all. I was really deeply moved, Andy honey, really, and I’ve been looking very deeply into my own feelings and needs since then. Into what

I want in a husband. But this puts a different color on a decision like that, doesn’t it? It does make a difference.”

I got frightened. “Kate, please!!” I said. I’d blown it! She’ll never want to marry me now! Oh, God! “Kate, this isn’t me!” I almost started to cry. “I’ve never done any of these things!”

“Why not?”

A surprising question. I turned to look behind me, and found I was looking straight into her eyes. They were quite serious, curious, not at all scornful. I couldn’t answer her. Because I’m a real man, not a sissy? Because the idea scared me? Would pretending to be a woman scare a real man? Any answer declared that I was either a wannabe sissy or a pathetic wimp! So I said nothing.

There was one pathetic wimp in our circle we saw socially now and then, and I’d always felt sorry for him. In fact just the previous week Kate’s best friend Claire had brought him to dinner with her — they were married. Claire is a strong-minded, no-nonsense doctor where they both work, stunning and self-assured, and Wilmer looks to be her completely opposite — he’s good-looking enough, and well-built, but very quiet, even timid. I think he’s an accountant. And Claire keeps him that way. Wilmer spoke up only twice all evening and she put him down both times, and he looked apologetic both times.

After they left we talked about mismatched couples. Kate thought Wilmer an interesting choice in a man for a dynamic woman like Claire. “She likes to be in charge, I suppose,” she said. “There’s something to say for that.”

I thought so too. “I guess Claire likes wearing the pants. Or maybe she enjoys Wilmer so much from the waist down — he looks pretty fit, physically — that she doesn’t mind any deficiencies higher up.”

Kate started to say something about that, then lapsed silent.

But now, I thought, she’s surely thinking I’m another Wilmer! Oh, God!

Suddenly she came around in front of me and pushed my keyboard to one side and turned and leaned her round rump onto the edge of my desk and then lifted up and sat down right where the keyboard had been. There just under my face was her crotch, covered by her tight jeans, the deep crease between her legs visible despite the heavy denim. Her labia may have been swollen the whole length of her slit. Was she excited about something? I couldn’t take my eyes off that crease. Was the denim dark there, because she was a little wet?

Now her body was blocking the screen. “Never mind these games you like to play with your imagination,” she said. “Let’s see what you’re really capable of doing. Do you really want to be my submissive sissy girl, Annie honey? To do everything I tell you? Let’s say I want you to kiss my pussy, right there where you’re staring? Would you want to?”

There was safety in honesty. “Yes.”

“But would you do it? Kiss it just the way it is, just because I tell you to? I’ve had no shower all day, and there’s sweat and who knows what other kinds of dried moisture down there, maybe even some pee that never got wiped away. And who knows what else right now.” She wiggled her bottom on the desk a few times, tempting me. I thought about it. We’d never done any oral sex, just a lick and a promise once, right after we’d both showered and gotten into bed. She didn’t seem to want it, at least from me. So this was a test of some kind.

“Yes,” I said.

“What if I’ve just been with another man, and haven’t had time to clean myself up. Would you kiss me there anyhow? Like right now?”

Now she was playing with me. There haven’t been any other men. There couldn’t have been. “Have you been?” I asked.

“That’s not the question. The question is, would you if I told you to? Now that you’re worried, why don’t you ask me to let you kiss my pussy? Are you afraid to ask, sissy girl!”

“Please, Kate,” I blurted out desperately, trying to show her I was a man, not afraid to ask. “May I kiss your pussy?” There it still was, that magical crease curving down below her pelvic mound.

“Please, who?”

I thought a moment. I knew she was a quick study, and I couldn’t be sure what she’d absorbed while she was surfing her way through “Sissify.” So I went all out. “Please, Mistress Kate, may I kiss your beautiful cunt? Please?”

“Maybe,” she replied.

She sounded as if she were enjoying this new teasing game. I didn’t dare look up and break the spell. It isn’t polite to look directly at your Mistress’s face when you are being dominated.

“Annie, I don’t think I want you to call me “Mistress,” except maybe when I need to be strict with you. But you can’t call me ‘Kate’ any more. It isn’t respectful from a sissy-girl. “‘Kate’ is for an equal, for a boyfriend or a girlfriend. And you aren’t my boyfriend right now, and you aren’t my girlfriend either. Not yet. So you’d better call me ‘Ms. Katherine’ or ‘Ma’am’ until you’re one or the other. Are you willing to serve me unquestioningly, Annie dear? To do everything I tell you? To be mine? For me to own you?”

I was absolutely entranced! This was too good to be true! Here was my actual girlfriend playing my favorite fantasy game, and I never knew she even knew about that kind of thing! Maybe we could stretch this out through the entire weekend? “Oh, Yes, Ms. Katherine!” I replied. I glanced quickly up, then shyly back down to her crotch again. She was indeed grinning broadly to herself, delighted about something, and from the gleam in her eyes I could see that her mind was racing away at a mile a minute! “Yes, Ma’am!,” I repeated for emphasis.

“Everything? I mean it, Andy! I really mean it! Are you sure you don’t want to back away!”

What could she have in mind? I didn’t care! I was ecstatic!

“Yes, Ms. Katherine.”

“Then in token of your new servile status you may touch your nose and mouth to my pussy and sniff me once, and then kiss me through my jeans. Later maybe I’ll let you smell my naked slit and lick up anything you find there, if you can prove you’re really sincere, and if you do everything I ask. Not yet.”

She paused for a moment. I could tell that all kinds of switches were closing on plans in her head. “Then, Annie dear, I want you to go up to our bedroom and strip yourself naked and wait for me to join you there. I need to make some arrangements down here before we continue with this.”

I hesitated. Had she finished speaking?

“I should have known about this streak in you, Andy, or now you’re ‘Annie,’ aren’t you? But I can’t say I’ve ever suspected it! Well! It couldn’t be more convenient!”

I waited.

“Go on, go ahead! Hurry up! Kiss me, then upstairs quickly, and wait! I’ll want to look through other files in this computer of yours, too, and see what else has been on your mind. I want to see what else you like to think constitutes the good life.”

So I closed my eyes and leaned forward and nuzzled her crotch. The denim was in fact damp, with a faint end-of-day body odor, like perspiration, a little sour, and a little musky, but nothing specific. I pushed my face deep into her, then kissed her gently. She responded by pushing her pussy back into my face ever so slightly, just once, as if nodding in acknowledgement.

Then not daring to look at her again I stood up and ran out of the room, up into our bedroom, and I stripped down. I was still terribly embarrassed, but now also terribly excited, and I had this incredible boner, the biggest and hardest I’ve ever had! Nothing like this had happened between us in the whole time we’d been living together, nearly two years! It had started out as a pairing of convenience, I had the whole house and she had money to share the rent. Then it quickly become a bedding down of convenience too — we liked each other and we got on, and we slept together whenever either of us wanted to. Then after a while it looked as if we were going steady. She had other friends, and I did too, and we had no specific understandings and made no exclusive claims on each other, but there we were. Little by little my other really intimate relationships dropped away. Kate worked long hours, days and nights sometimes, and she took a girl’s night out with Claire or some other woman from work now and then, to unwind with them. But otherwise we’d become a close couple.

Not long ago I realized that I was in love with her. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. She’s tall, with smooth dark hair that just barely curls in to hug her neck above her shoulders, and huge eyes and wide cheekbones, always with a grave but gentle expression on her face, and she always moves gracefully, perfectly self-assured. She’s everything feminine I’d ever wanted! And she has this positive way about her, touched with playfulness. I realized I’d do anything for her!

So I finally got up the nerve and asked her to marry me. I wanted us to go on forever. She’d never suggested to me that she felt the same way about me, but she listened to me carefully, I thought affectionately, and then quietly she’d told me she’d let me know. It might take some time, there were things she wanted to think about, she said, but her answer for now was not ‘No’ and I’d have to be content with that.

But now, I thought despairing as I sat on the bed naked, waiting for her, the odds for a ‘Yes’ had dropped to zero. My cock shrank down.

After a long half-hour, maybe more, she came into the bedroom. In between I heard her make a couple of phone calls, and mutter some things in a low voice, and share a laugh with someone at the other end once, someone female I figured because she finished the conversation squealing in delight and giggling about something I couldn’t quite make out. I was sitting on the bed waiting for her as ordered. No big deal, we’d seen each other in the buff almost from the moment she moved in. It was a matter of convenience, two

people living together and sleeping together and working odd hours.

She shut the door behind her. “I see you haven’t learned some of the things I’ve learned while scanning your interesting little collection of smut. First of all, what does a sexual inferior say when he’s been permitted to kiss his Lady’s private parts? You came here without a word.”

“Thank you, Ms. Katherine,” I instantly replied, making a mental note never to forget that courtesy when we next got to play this game together.

“Do you know how to curtsy when you say that, sissy girl?”

I stood up and tried. Right foot back, hands at sides, bend the other knee, and bow. Or something like that.

“And how does a sissy await a Mistress when she’s told him to wait for her?”

I immediately fell to my knees and pushed my forehead into the shag rug that covered the floor. My cock became hard again, crammed between my belly and my thighs.

“That’s better,” she said.

Then for ten more minutes, not a word from her. She went into her closet and rustled among the clothes hangers, and she opened a locked cabinet where she kept different things related to her work, and closed it again, and she hummed to herself for a minute or two, I imagined she was doing something that didn’t require her full attention. I heard her sit down on the bed behind me, and I worried that now I was presenting my backside to her, high up in the air, mooning her. That didn’t seem very respectful. But I didn’t dare raise my head or change my position.

“Annie dear.”

My penis gave a little leap at that, and I settled in to listen very carefully, eager to play the submissive some more with her!

“I told you before that I was going to test your sincerity. I mean really test it. What I have in mind is not a game, though I’m sure you still think it is. I hope you’ll like the new relationship I have in mind, and that afterward you’ll truly appreciate what I’ve done. If you do, we may even end up married after all!”

My heart bounded up at that, and I felt it beat powerfully inside me! Hope!

“But not everything a sissy girl ends up doing is necessarily what she expected or wanted to do in the first place, is it, Annie?”

“No, Ma’am,” I muttered, my mouth muffled by the thick shag rug. My knees were grateful for that rug at the moment. Kate apparently had a plan now fully ripened in her mind. Did it include whipping, or torture? I wasn’t into pain of any kind, as my knees already testified. I hoped not. It surely involved the entire weekend the way I’d hoped, because she’d said “afterward,” and talked about how we’d “end up.” Maybe even married!

“I saw from all those stories you read downstairs what turns you on. Not cruelty, but humiliation. You really want to feel yourself being transformed into a woman. Any of your usual manly pride or dignity has to be melted down, made to feel uncomfortable, even intolerable, so you’ll be eager to collaborate with me as I reshape you into what I want. That’s what assures me you’ll obey me in everything, isn’t it? That my way becomes the course of least resistance for you. Not what you think my way ought to be, and not your way. My way!”

Kate had this incredible ability to get to the heart of things! I was enthralled! “Yes, Ms. Katherine,” I said. “That’s it exactly!”

“Your opinion whether I’m exact or not is not welcome, Annie!” Kate snapped. “I asked you for a simple ‘yes’!”

I cringed even further into the shag rug, my mouth now filling with the yarn, but I dared not lift my head. “Yes, Ma’am,” I said muffled.

“And you know from your stories that sissy submissives often get more than they bargained for, don’t they? Mistresses go much further than their slaves mean for them to go, don’t they? That’s where the excitement comes in, doesn’t it? From feeling that things are out of control, that control has passed from your desires to hers, that you’re now helpless to resist her desires, that you’ve made yourself her creature. Don’t bother to answer this time. I know this is so.”

I writhed for just a moment to try to dislodge my mouthful of shag rug. It was effectively gagging me. But since my forehead had to stay plastered to the floor, my mouth filled all the more.

“All right, Annie, you’ve been warned. You know now that I understand not just the rituals of this game you want to play, but its soul. And that I understand your soul! That if you are to be my servant, you’ll be my kind of servant, not your kind. My slave. That I’ll possess you absolutely. And I mean for life!”

She paused. Was she talking about marriage? No, not exactly. Now I felt genuinely frightened. But so deliciously! She said she’d go even further than I’d dreamed! Was she serious? I really couldn’t tell. But that’s the way this game had to be played! She had such a marvelous instinct for it! I was so absolutely convinced she fully meant everything she said!

In the stories I’d read, whenever a sex-slave accepts his status, his Lady padlocks a leather collar around his neck, engraved with her name. Something like that. I waited for Kate to suggest something like that. And that’s what she did next!

“Now Annie, you know that sissies owned by their Ladies always agree to wear some kind of symbol of their servitude. It’s always more or less permanent, not easily removed. I want you to wear my symbol every hour of every day, at work, at home, in the shower, in bed, everywhere.”

I was positively enraptured! Just as I’d always hoped! Sweet juices rose into my distended prick! In my extreme crouch, squeezed between my pelvis and my thighs, it was perilously close to exploding, and in buckets! I had to distract myself! I tried paying not-too-close attention to Kate’s words, but it was hard.

I’d been dreaming of this moment much of my life! Would Kate now fasten a dog collar around my neck? Wrap leather thongs around my genitals? Lock a chastity tube onto my cock? I was trembling!

“Now Annie, you are going to wear a special pledge to me that’s unmistakable! So you’ll never forget who owns you, and how I own you, and for what! I know you still have to function in the real world, so it won’t be too visible to the casual eye. In most circumstances you’ll be able to hide it. It won’t be part of the way the world sees you, or how you think they see you. Not unless I tell you to reveal it, as I probably will soon, not right away. So for now it’ll be something just between us, and of course anyone I may choose to tell about it. You’ll feel too ashamed to tell anyone about it at first, I’m sure, too humiliated. Until you’ve re-centered your identity and become what I want you to be. Then you’ll feel proud of it, and then I know you’ll want to display it openly.”

Mysterious! Not some kind of cock-binder? A very thin slave collar to wear under button-down dress shirts at the office? An ear ring in a pierced ear? She seems to expect I’ll wear it all the time. Well, all right, clearly she doesn’t mean to disgrace me with anything obvious, some massive restraint on my neck or my ankle that would raise embarrassing questions. She wasn’t cruel. I felt utterly devoted to Kate at that moment. She knew my needs, and I knew she wouldn’t betray them!

“Once again, Andy! ‘Andy’ for the last time. Think of this as the most crucial moment of your life! It is for me too, because whether you know it or not, and I’m sure you don’t, you here on your face with your ass in the air in absolute surrender to me happens to be just perfect for me! It solves a big problem I’ve had for some time! So! Andy, do you accept my guidance in all things from now on. As you would put it, will you obey me as your Domme, or Mistress, or Dominatrix, or Lady, whatever you call such women? As your owner? Do you offer me your most precious gift, your absolute obedience? Whether or not I choose to care, or even seem grateful? Am I the one person you will love, honor, and obey, and have and hold in sickness and health for as long as you live?”

Was she marrying me? Was she agreeing to marry me? No, but I was delighted anyhow. In her mind I was marrying her! That’s half of it!

Now she was silent, waiting patiently for my answer. All this only an hour or two after she’d walked into my study and discovered my secret fantasy life! What other sexual games could she conceive for next weekend, or whenever we both became weary of this one, I wondered. What an incredible woman!

“Yes, Ma’am,” I remembered to say despite my excitement. “Yes, Ms. Katherine. Yes, my Lady! I do!”

“I heard you, but this is important, so I want to ask you yet again. And to warn you yet again. For the third and final time, Andy. I have in mind some things you may love in fantasy but not like in reality at all. Not until you become the creature of *my* fantasy. Are you willing?”

Pain? Torture? I hoped not. Fabulous tests of endurance, of my devotion to her, of my ability to hold up under enormous hardships for her sweet sake? I’d love that! I loved her!

“Yes, Ms. Katherine, I am willing!” I finally managed to say it! I never felt more excited in my life! My heart pounded! I was near fainting! “Please! Whatever you wish!”

And suddenly a rich joy rose up unbidden and uncontrollable from deep in my groin into the base of my prick! I couldn’t help it! I felt a ravishing tension rise up in my bowels and become a rainbow glow, and suffuse itself through all of that part of me thrust closest to her, filling my thighs with exquisite bliss. My ass clenched and quivered over and over, and then a glory spilled out into a rapturous spurt after spurt of hot cum squirting all over my belly and chest and even in splats into my mouth, crammed as it now was with yarn from the shag rug! My penis was so squeezed so tight now between my thighs that I couldn’t feel its spasmodic throbbing, but I felt my body go incandescent! The entire lower part of me went into orgasm!

Which may be why I felt nothing at all from Kate at that moment. I expected her to fasten the collar, or attach a lasso to my balls and lead me away for binding.

She did no such thing. In fact she didn’t even know I’d just enjoyed the greatest climax of my life. As the glow subsided I realized that the whole grand process had been hidden in the deep folds of my belly and thighs, and my cum wasn’t evident anywhere just yet.

She merely resumed speaking. But this time I heard a note of elation in her voice, even though she was trying to maintain the same controlled tone she’d used earlier. Not casual, though a touch negligent. Firm, the voice a Mistress should use when speaking to her servant. But now it also sounded exultant.

“Annie, there is no going back now. You’re already changing! The two pricks you just felt in your rear end were two intramuscular injections to help get the process under way the moment I had your fully informed consent, tape recorded and repeated three times.”

“Both injections are long term. One will really sissify you as rapidly as medicine knows how. It will pump estrogen estradiol and progesterone and certain androgen suppressants into your body for the next two weeks. Then after we evaluate your body’s response to the dosage we’ll implant patches in you so the process can continue and finish without anyone giving it further thought. It will give you a girl’s way of thinking and feeling, and many characteristics of a girl’s body. You’re going to be a girl in your body, not just in your mind.”

“The other shot was a tranquilizer-sedative, the kind we give to patients undergoing minor surgical procedures. I want to keep you mellowed out for the next few days, peaceably asleep, because I want you to remember this initiation with joy, with no associated pain or soreness. When you awaken, you’ll be fitted with your pledge to me, my symbol of ownership. I’ve just arranged it with Claire, and she’ll be here shortly to help me fit it properly. For now only you will know it’s there, though you’ll never be able to forget it’s there. Until you want everyone to know, and that will be much sooner than you imagine.”

“Annie, you are a dear! You’ll know soon enough how very dear you are to me! When you wake up.” Then she added, “Poor sweetie, you never did get to lick my pussy clean. Well, it’ll be here, and you’ll have lots of opportunities.”

I remember she said all that, and that it felt increasingly good that she was saying all those things. What was her “symbol”? Maybe body piercings? Maybe a ring in my “frenum,” whatever that was? Despite all that talk about shots and changing and all, everything she said was deeply satisfying, and I felt utterly content as I rolled over onto my side on the shag rug, asleep.

The next morning I opened my eyes. No! The calendar clock on our night table said I’d been asleep for three days! So three mornings later I woke up to sunshine flooding the room.

“There you are, Annie honey!” Kate said, drawing back the last curtain. Now the light seemed nearly blinding. “I’m on call now and I’ve just been called, but I’ll be  

back to see how you’re getting on in about two hours. Today is the first day of the rest of your life, honey, and believe me, that’s not a cliche. You’ll lead a very different life from now on. Just lie there and rest. Your incisions are practically healed already, and you’ve been completely depillated, and now there’s nothing much for you to do but enjoy discovering the new you.”

She came over and stood over me. Gradually I remembered. Kate. She’d found out I was into humiliation fantasies, loss of masculinity and so on, caught me reading files in Sissify.Com. And she’d taken over, she owned me. I stared up at her, still unable to find words to speak. The weekend was over? That must have been some scene, I thought! Where was I while we played it out? Then I remembered that talk about tranquilizers, and sedatives, and not feeling sore.

“Ah, I see you’re with us again. Lie still a little longer. Remember, you’re mine now, and you are not to put anything of mine at risk. I want you to discover how I own you all by yourself, and when you do I want you to just lie there and do nothing but think about what it means. You pledged yourself to me, remember.”

I lifted my arms to inspect them, and finding nothing, reached down toward my crotch.

“No, there are no tattoos, and nothing fastened down there either. And no body parts missing. And nothing buckled or embossed or inscribed or punctured or pierced. What you’re wearing is implanted, its now part of you. What I want for you. In time they will become what you want. Understood?”

I nodded.

She left, closing the door gently. I lay there for a moment to gather more of my wits. Then I rolled over to climb out of bed.

I saw I was wearing one of her frilly nighties with puffed out sleeves. She had a few, though mostly she wore oversized T-Shirts to bed. My own PJ’s were all in the wash? This nightgown was left over from some feminization game we’d played while I was zonked, I guessed. My arms were hairless, absolutely smooth! My legs felt that way too! Well, I hoped she’d enjoyed the game! I felt sorry it was probably over.

Still leaning on one elbow and raised up, I felt a sort of pulling on my torso, as if something were hanging from me. A fold of the nightgown? No. Flesh that had been spread out across my chest while I lay on my back was now hanging down heavily from me in the form of two heavy pouches tipped with nipples, the nipples distended and brushing against the bed. Breasts. They were breasts.

My breasts! Large ones! Two of them! I stared unbelieving and abruptly put my legs over the side of the bed and sat up. Then I just sat there! With my shoulders slumped forward they sagged, though my skin was just firm enough to support them. Through the neckline of Kate’s nightgown I could see their curves — they were soft, hanging breasts! I pulled my shoulders back, and they became ripe, rounded globes jutting away from me, their areolas and nipples like small brown teacups projecting outward. I reached to heft one. Heavy! My fingers touched one of my nipples and a delicious tingle shot through me, spreading down to my crotch. I touched the other nipple. The same! O God, it felt so good! But I was a man! These were a woman’s breasts! This wasn’t one of my fantasies! Maybe one of Kate’s, but not mine! Well yes, having breasts had been one of my fantasies, but not in reality! Kate wasn’t playing just for the weekend! Had she tried to warn me of that?

She had! These were these the badges of my servitude. Kate meant to disintegrate my manhood, to really change me into a female. So it seemed. She’d said as much, I vaguely recalled. And I’d been so eager to submit to her! Now, by daylight it didn’t seem to be as good an idea. I glanced down further, and felt momentarily reassured that my cock and balls were still there.

I picked up a breast in each hand and then dropped them. They each jounced once, then hung there. Implants. Huge. Part of me. They were there all right. But they weren’t mine. I was theirs. And they belonged to Kate. She wanted me to take care of them for her. I held each in my hands again, gently this time, and stroked their nipples again with my thumbs. The most delectable feeling rose up in my groin, deep, sultry, luscious, as erotic as if my penis were being squeezed and stroked. Yet it stayed soft. I just sat there and caressed my new self with my thumbs. It felt good!

…continued in Chapter II


Sandy’s breasts were heaving — she was pinching and tweaking her enlarged nipples as her head thrashed back and forth and her hips and ass squirmed on the silken bed coverings. “More — More — don’t stop — make me cum!”, she screamed. Her sweat-covered body was being driven into a frenzy by Becky, her sister-in-law whose tongue was dancing on her clit like a violinist dancing on his strings. “Don’t stop — PLEEEASSE — make me cum!”, she pleaded. Becky knew just how to touch and play with Sandy’s body, bringing it to the throes of orgasm time and time again. And then it happened — in a sudden shriek Sandy’s body tensed up as she was driven over the edge by an expert at oral love.

She laid there for some time as Becky softly caressed her lush, naked body. Her breasts were large, like Becky’s — and her feminine form was filled with every interesting curve that rightly belonged to young 20-something women. They were lovers now, lesbian lovers who shared another secret — the secret of what they had done with Sandy’s husband, Mike.

Sandy and Mike had been married for seven years. He had known all along that his wife had lesbian tendencies — and he even encouraged them, hoping to be drawn into a soft three-way sexual dance. It never happened — but it still turned Mike on to know that his wife was at times in the arms of an attractive female.

Becky was Mike’s sister — older than Mike by only two years. She was a dominant personality her whole life, and Mike always yielded to the sister that he loved. Becky knew this — and, with Sandy’s help, she used it against her younger brother.

Becky was a Gynecologist with a degree also in Psychology. At the present time her Practice was in Counseling, specializing in hypno-therapy. Unbeknownst to him, Mike had been one of her latest subjects over the past 8 months. With Sandy’s help, he had come along quite nicely.

This morning, Mike was asleep in his own bedroom. He had been sent there nine hours ago and was programmed to come downstairs at exactly 9:00 a.m. Becky had arrived at the house three hours earlier to “get things ready” and to have her morning fling with Sandy, her luscious sister-in-law.

“Do you think she’ll go over the edge when she sees what we’ve DONE to her?”, asked Sandy — a little worried today, since Becky had come over to take Mike out of his eight month trance.

“Don’t worry, luv!”, Becky replied. “she is so conditioned now, that she will be unable to do anything but what we tell her to do from now on.”

“But we’ve changed him so MUCH!”, Sandy countered.

Indeed they had! Eight months ago Mike was an attractive young husband with a healthy male appetite. Over the course of the 12 months Becky, through hypnosis and drug therapy, had changed him. It began slowly over dinner one night as Becky, using her feminine charms and a special amulet hypnotized Mike at the dinner table. While Sandy watched, unbelieving, she suggested that Mike wished he were a little more feminine.

“You’d feel much better — more yourself — if you were wearing some satin panties, now WOULDN’T you, mike”, she said to the mind-captured male. “In fact, panties are all you want to wear now. They are so soft — so sweet — so feminine. TELL me, mike — what do you want to do?”

“i want to put on my panties”, he said with a blank stare. And then he left the table, went upstairs to his wife’s dresser and put on a pair of her panties — red, satin ones. He came back to the table still in his shirt and tie and socks — but wearing the red panties.

“Wearing panties feels right to you, mike. From now on it will never occur to you to wear anything BUT female panties. Tomorrow, you will buy panties to replace all those ugly male shorts in your drawer.”

“Yes, Mistress”, mike responded. he went upstairs, cut up all his male underwear — and rejoined his wife and sister. After she brought him out of his trance he sat there talking with them in his red panties as though it were the most natural thing in the world. And THAT was only Day One!

Day by day — bit by bit they feminized him. The next day he was shaving — UNTIL they made it permanent. And immediately they began to introduce the right amount of female hormones and other sex-changing drugs to change his body to a more feminine form. he continued to work and act as though he were still Mike — but his dress and mannerisms showed anything BUT a normal, healthy male.

At work, people noticed that mike had changed. When they would say something, he’d laugh it off, wondering why everyone seemed to be picking on him. he continued working until three month ago when he was fired. his boss made up some excuse — ANYTHING to get rid of a fag who was changing himself into a girl.

Now, mike was anything BUT a man. his skin was soft and smooth as any young woman of 20 years of age. his face had been softened by therapy — his hair, a long, silky blonde mane. his eyebrows and permanent makeup showed the face of a cover-girl — his lips made full from treatment were soft, full and sensual.

his body was filled with every interesting curve of a young virgin. 36″ breasts heaved from his body. his waist had been trimmed down to a 25″ frame. his hips flared out to 35″ meeting his smooth, long and sensuous legs which seemed to go on and on.

In mike’s eyes, he was still Mike — a healthy male, husband of Sandy, brother to Becky. When he looked in the mirror he saw a male — but whenever anyone else saw him, they looked upon a sex goddess who was built for play.

“What will he DO when you bring him out of his trance?”, Sandy wondered with a little fear in her voice.

“SHE’LL do exactly what she’s TOLD to do”, Becky said with every confidence. “And now it’s time for our little sissy to make her debut!”

************

mike came down to the kitchen, dressed in a blue babydoll nightie that barely covered his matching panty. his feet were covered with big, fluffy, blue things that looked cute on little girls. his breasts were aroused by the crisp morning air. “Good morning dears”, he said as he gave his wife a kiss and came over to give his sister a peck on the cheek. “Lovely morning!”

Becky waited until mike sat down — and they she said: “today’s the day!” It was the post-hypnotic phrase that would take mike out of his 8 month trance. mike looked dazed for a second and then shrieked in horror as he looked down on his ultra-feminine form.

“What in the hell is THIS?”, he said as he feminine body for the first time. “What have you DONE to me?”

“At EASE, young lady”, said Becky taking immediate control of the situation. “you will SIT there and listen to every word I have to say — and WHILE you sit there, I want you to start playing with your nipples with your right hand while you caress your dick through your panties with your left.”

mike couldn’t stop himself. Still dumbfounded, he found his hand involuntarily moving to his breasts and cock. he began to softly caress his female parts as Becky began the explanation and his new commands.

“mike — or shall I say MICHELLE — you have been under my spell for a long time. your pretty WIFE and me have FEMINIZED you — and we have done a pretty good job of it, don’t you think?” michelle nodded as she began to feel aroused as her feminine hands toyed with her soft breasts and hard cock.

“As you can SEE, michelle, you are no longer a man. you’ve always fantasized about your wife and her lesbian lovers. Well, SHE fantasized about making YOU one of her lesbian lovers — and — well, WE DID! The changes that you see in yourself are REAL — AND they are permanent.” michelle was starting to squirm now as she gave in to her feminine form and her feminine touch.

“From now on you will ALWAYS be michelle — a ravishing shemale. But in your MIND you will always be Mike — the humiliated and defeated male. I want you to be embarrassed by everyone you see. I want you to feel as though every eye were undressing you and every person’s thought was given toward fucking you. you are our shemale SEX toy, michelle — and you will only be able to do what I say you can do. By the way — don’t cum yet — just HOLD yourself there.”

michelle was on the verge of cumming and he was totally humiliated at the scene in front of him. wearing female clothes in front of his wife and sister — playing with his tits and cock — feeling he silk and satin caress his body was all too much for him. he was crying now — even as he kept himself on the pinnacle of sexual release.

“michelle, i want you to slip your panties off and CUM inside your panty”, Becky said. michelle did. she came like never before, filling her panty with streams of hot, shemale cum. Then she noticed as her wife, Sandy, walked in front of her. Sandy was now dressed in leather bra and panties — with a huge black dildo attached to her waist. She wiped the head of the black cock into the pool of cum and held it to her husband’s face.

“SUCK it, michelle”, Becky demanded. “you WANT to suck that cock — you want to become a cocksucker for us, don’t you?” michelle opened her painted mouth to take in the huge black phallus while shaking her head in an involuntary “yes”. “Suck it, michelle”, Becky urged. “Even though somewhere inside you are disgusted by the thought of it, you cannot help yourself. you will feel panic and even PAIN — unless you suck a REAL cock at least once a day!”

“She’s making me a cocksucker!”, thought mike as he watched himself being played with as a puppet on a string. he sucked at the black cock shamefully and shamelessly. he couldn’t help himself. Even though he wanted desperately to be a man, he was anything BUT a man. They had turned him into a submissive, slut who would beg to suck cock every day for as long as it pleased them.

When Sandy was finished feeding michelle her cum, she commanded him to stand and pose in front of them. michelle twirled and posed as a sexy model would, feeling shame and guilt as she did. Then Becky said another key phrase: “Sissy!” With that word michelle’s cock grew hard and rigid once again.

“Every time you hear that word you will grow hard and your sexual cravings will overwhelm you. you will be able to think of nothing other than sex — and you will be willing to do anything to relieve your sexual heat. Nothing will release your sexual frenzy other than an orgasm. Do you understand, michelle?”, Becky asked.

michelle shook her head as she again began to feel her body betray her. She tore at his flimsy nightie, tearing it from her body and BEGGING his wife to fuck him. “Please, honey. FUCK me! i’ll do ANYTHING to cum! Please — find me SOMEONE to fuck!”

he was in a frenzy now — a frenzy that would only be satisfied if someone let him cum. Sandy was not about to let this moment go to waste. Still wearing her black cock she commanded her husband to get on all fours! And then, as michelle’s naked body prepared itself — breasts swaying — ass seductively inviting the cock to penetrate her — Sandy thrust the black dildoe deep within her husband’s pussy. As she fucked him, Becky said: “CUM”. mike came, leaving a pool below him. “EAT it”, she commanded. And, with Sandy still fucking his pussy hole, michelle lowered her head and lapped up her cum.

***********

That was a week ago. Since then, michelle has made a lot of money for his wife and sister. You see, he can do nothing BUT — ever since they turned him into a shemale and slut, unbeknowst to him.

Of course there is more inside that we dont dare show out here!
 

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